Who is on your Team?
I know, Melrad’s blog is supposed to be composed of posts about racing and training, so please excuse my diversion. Well, for most of us our racing and training is just a portion of our lives. Albeit important, it is not the end all be all, and falls after family and that dreaded four letter word, work. Personally for me, each and everyday is a mini triathlon. Getting up at 5, hitting the pool by 6, getting to work by 7:30. getting in a second workout, making dinner, doing homework, packing for the next day, and then getting up and doing it all again. It is an exhausting schedule that is filled with sleep deprivation and often is very lonely. I am not one of those lucky people who can take off weeks at a time from work and have never really been able to relate to those who can. This year the most time I have gotten off in a row was three days. I can not blow off work in the middle of the day to go for a ride or run, the market is still open. I do not have a nanny, no maid, no chef, no nutritionist, and our extended family lives miles away. It is just Paul and me. No matter how stressful and busy my day, my boys still have to do their homework, dinner still needs to be made, and yes Heather, the laundry still has to be done. My friends and coworkers think I am crazy, which may be true. The truth of the matter is that while I get all of the glory, the custom race kit, the boxes of Probars, the fancy Avia shoes, the custom wetsuit, the $8,000.00 mountain bike, my husband sits in my shadow. He is the whole reason I started racing in the first place. After seeing me struggle to pick up the pieces after my second son was born, he signed me up for Moab and Keystone. I came home from a run and he said, now you have to do it and not just talk about it.
Anyone who knows Paul, knows he is loud, outspoken, and to some, downright obnoxious. My favorite story to tell is from Ogden two years ago. Melanie, Ross, myself, and Paul were at dinner after the race. Ross looked at Paul and Mel and said, “Do you two ever shut-up?” Yes, Ross he is sometimes quiet, although those moments are few and far between. Or the time the Kahuna told him after posting the fastest bike split at Tahoe, coming out of the water almost last, but pulling off a podium finish. “Well Paul, you sure talk a lot of shit, but at least you have the legs to back it up.” Yes, Dave, he can be perceived as arrogant, but, if I had his confidence, I would probably be on the podium, instead of looking up at it. The truth of the matter is that it is through his sacrifices and support, that I am able to train and race. I am so glad to have him on my team. His team spirit is not just for me. Paul is always working on bikes at Xterras. He is the first person to bust out the stand and tools. Sometimes you may not see him at the races, but you will hear him, cheering your name, and yelling to go faster. For goodness sake, way more people at Xterra races know Paul, then me. I can not tell you how many blank stares I have gotten as I wave to people I have met with him. Later they say, oh you are Paul’s wife, sorry. He has been encouraging me for ten years. This Saturday, September 5, 2009, is our tenth year wedding anniversary. Yes, I am only 33, you do the math, and yes, we beat the odds. That does not mean everything has been moonbeams and rainbows, far from it. Just ask any of our friends that have experienced our constant bantering. Doug, Brian, Sara? Nothing in our 10 year marriage has been conventional or ordinary, not even the story of how we met.
It was the summer of 1997 and I was a senior at CU, slinging bagels at Moe’s on the side. I was just returning there after a semester hiatus of random babysitting jobs. I remember this obnoxious guy coming in and saying, whose mountain bike is that. I responded it is mine. He asked, can you actually ride it. I stammered, well sort of. The truth was, I loved mountain biking, but I was horrible. I was terribly slow and terrified of falling. We went for a ride anyways and I showed up with no gloves, fell a number of times, and ended up with a hand full of cactus. That summer we traveled all over the state me falling more then riding and Paul patiently waiting for me. He always drove home, I was usually asleep by mile two. We spent a ton of time together, but steadfastly remained friends. We had an uncanny amount of things in common. Our birthdays were 3 years and 363 days apart, our Fathers shared a birthday 20 years apart to the day. We had both always been the new kid in school and had both been forced into sports that were our Fathers’ passions. For me it was hours in the pool, for him, the golf course. That was where it ended. Paul was confident, outspoken, and brash. He had dropped out of college to move to Colorado, he loved mountain biking that much. I had already planned out my life path and school was my number one priority. I left Colorado to mountaineer in BC for a month, an early graduation gift, and when I returned; Paul decided to move to Breckenridge and I was focused on graduation and what part of the world I wanted to explore next. In October, his birthday rolled around and that was it. I almost fell to the floor as one of my best friends professed his love for me. The next couple of years were a whirlwind, I put my world travel plans on hold, moved to Breckenridge, we traveled the country with our mountain bikes, and by 1999, were planning our wedding. My family was not exactly head over heals. My Dad kept asking if I was pregnant and my Mom was worried that I was going to give up my own dreams and settle for his instead. Ten years has not exactly flown by. We both had to grow up pretty quickly when I found out I was pregnant at 25. Yes, Mom, I did have to put my some of my dreams on hold, but look what I got in return
Paul lost his job in June, so there will be no fancy dinner, no extravagant gifts, or lavish vacations to celebrate our marriage. Yes, I would love a vacation, but I get to celebrate everyday. I am so lucky to have found someone that loves me so much, that he lets me do what I love. Not to mention, one of the most amazing Fathers I have ever met, all boys should be so lucky. Just look how many wonderful memories we have made. Thank you Paul for putting up with me for ten years and I look forward to many more. Just remember at the end of the day to ask yourself, who is really on your team, and thank them.
